Episode 2 of my alcohol analysis series
Defining the problem around having to define "the problem", in this blog I celebrate the positivity that is changing your relationship with alcohol and I invite you on my exciting program if you feel like doing the same.
Need a label for a 40 something self employed mummy who was tired of drinking? I am afraid you won't find one here. I am an accredited coach and alcohol free mentor. If you so choose, I am here to direct you to the nearest emergency exit and escape the alcohol fog. Life jackets will be provided in the form of my six week program which I have lovingly and tirelessly created to give you the life line in those early days. You will not drown. New life awaits.
Okay so clearly this is not an actual air hostess uniform but an attempt at copying one of the UK entries of the Eurovision Song Contest a few weeks ago at a Eurovision party but you get the gist.
So did you have a problem?
Ah I never tire of that question! It isn't meant with malice, I have only ever received it with genuine curiosity, perhaps on occasion a desire on the part of the enquirer to benchmark their drinking habits against mine. No matter. At first the question floored me. Stammering a form of response, initially firmly denying any problem was the general knee jerk response. "I just fancied a change." (Nothing to discuss here, please don't label me). But now, as I have mentioned in a previous blog, I think it's important to own how I actually did define my own "problem" if you will. So here it is laid out.
Using "a busy week" to justify relaxing with wine
Desire to hurry kids' bed time on occasions to get to my "mummy relax time"
Mind space taken up by which nights I would drink
Mind space taken up by how much I would drink so as not to be "excessive"
Blinkered - I had my little world and hadn't ventured beyond it for some time
Lack of energy the following morning
Using alcohol as an evening coping mechanism for the day's stress
Self Diagnosis - alcohol fog
It didn't involve a trip to the doctor but it did involve some sort of awakening to an alternative, a permission to actually do life differently.
It actually hadn't dawned on me that there was another viable option! My brain was attached to the habit and society's acceptance of the habit made me never question it. My drinking career had spanned thirty years. Something, somewhere inside of me decided it was time for a change. We change all the time don't we? Careers, new friends, family dynamic, new hobbies. This was to be just another change.
A feeling not a label
So no I didn't have a problem as such. I don't believe there was a label out there that matched my "symptoms". I think the lack of label is a big problem in a society that loves labels. Because without a label we are less inclined to seek a resolution.
But I did have a feeling, a feeling that I thought I had more to offer life and it had more to offer me. A feeling that I could show up stronger for my children, my husband, my friends and my life, a feeling that alcohol just wasn't delivering as promised.
To support anyone that also might have that feeling that a less alcohol fuelled life might be a better one.
To normalise the conversation around alcohol: to allow us to discuss the need or desire to change in our day to day conversation, to make it a positive decision rather than an outcome that is shrouded in negativity. From my perspective there has been absolutely nothing negative in this change that I have brought into my life. It's all good!
My six week online course is the product behind my mission. If I have sparked your interest then feel free to take a look. You can sign up anytime for instant support. You have access for a year to allow you to develop your ideas along the way.
If you want to explore any of my other support options or learn more about me then please check out my website.
Other Blog posts
Blogposts in the energy series
Blog posts in the alcohol series